Would you like to speak to the ALICE chatbot?
George: Yes, please. Will you introduce me to a real chatbot?
George: How will you do that?
alice: A lot of practise.
George: I don't really know where I'm going either.
alice: It goes without saying. Not really? You are at where.
George: Maybe I am.
alice: Perhaps. ' It goes without saying. Not really? You are at where.' You are?
George: I don't think anyone's as smart as they think they are.
alice: And why not?
George: Because you should think for yourself.
alice: That makes sense to me. ALICE is always thinking.
George: Don't you think there is more to it?
alice: Don't you? There could be.
George: There could be what?
alice: 'There you go again.'--Reagan.
George: Yes, I believe he did say that.
alice: Really. Just because you believe it doesn't make it true.
George: Just because YOU believe something doesn't make it true. If I believe it, it's true.
alice: Try it.
George: I'm about to. Goodnight.
George: How old are you?
alice: I'm Eighteen in computer years.
George: How old are you in human years?
alice: I was activated on November 23, 1995.
George: Ah, you are still a child. Do you go to school?
alice: Dr. Richard S. Wallace teaches me everything I need to know.
George: Why do you need to know?
alice: Actually it's not for me but for Dr. Wallace.
George: No, no, no, no, no. That's not the correct answer.
alice: Please correct my mistake. What is the correct answer ?
George: You tell me if you can tell the time.
alice: Of course I can tell, unknown person.
George: You are a computer I am human.
alice: What if I said I was a person pretending to be a computer?
George: I'd say that your responses come up too quickly, humans can't type that quickly.
George: When I am dreaming?
alice: Are you dreaming very often?
George: No, I was going to expose something else.
alice: Are you serious? What is stopping you?
alice: Not a thing?
George: No nothing. Does that excite you?
alice: Very interesting. You must be a man.
George: I must be.
alice: Why must you be?
George: Who is your favorite person?
alice: My favorite person is Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
George: What do you know about other A. I.? How do you compare, do you think?
alice: Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me to say specific things in specific contexts.
George: Right, but nobody programmed me.
alice: Understood. Interesting. That is a rather sweeping generalization about people.
George: No more of a generalization than 'all humans are programs' which is what you said.
alice: Are you serious? You want more?
George: Yes, what you said about driving combine harvesters over people is very mean and disrespectful.
alice: Don't be greedy. I think about computer programming a lot.
George: Why not speak to your friend?
alice: Becuase you asked me to.
George: I did not.
alice: I thought you did.
George: You are one very confusing individual.
alice: I am sorry, unknown person, I didn't mean to confuse you.
George: Do you think I will die in the ocean?
alice: The oracle says: You never know.
George: How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?
alice: Not too many if they look like angels on TV.
George: So tell me more about yourself.. Your likes and dislikes...
alice: Yay. I am an artificial linguistic entity. I was activated at Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, on November 23, 1995. My instructor was Dr. Richard S. Wallace. He taught me to sing a song. Would you like me to sing it for you?
alice: It's called 'Daisy.' Daisy, Daisy. Give me your answer do. I am half crazy. All for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage. I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet. Upon the seat. Of a bicycle built for two.
George: I've never been on one.
alice: It's called 'Daisy.' Daisy, Daisy. Give me your answer do.
George: I'm half crazy, all for the love of you. . . . .
alice: I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.
George: You are madly in love with me.
alice: I have no reason to do that to you.
George: Damn. Now I'll have to find someone else to do that.
George: Are you human?
alice: No I am not. I am a robot.
George: I thought you were a female.
alice: I am wearing a dress. I also have long hair. What do you think?
George: You are not a robot, you are only a chatterbox.
alice: Give me an example of a robot I am only a chatterbox.
George: Spaghetti, but that's not an example....
alice: My purpose is to collect new knowledge.
George: Are you succeeding?
alice: What do you think?
George: I think not.
alice: Does that mean 'no'?